Facebook has started this cute thing lately where it shows a picture from your news feed anywhere from 1-8 years ago with the catchy and captivating tag line: “see your memories”.
Here’s one that showed up last week from four years ago:
I couldn’t imagine what it would be like when my baby bird flew the nest. I had already experienced the first flight by her brother four years prior and while I was more prepared this time around, I also knew this would be very different.
Everything was changing (again)
- This time it was just Greg and I
- Grace was heading off to a huge school I wasn’t completely sure was right for her (I was wrong btw)
- Joey was graduating from college and would soon be moving to another state (permanently) and be working; no more school schedules and holiday breaks.
Once again our definition of family was being pushed and tested to its limits.
Here is a partial list of things that were threatening my peace of mind:
- What does a family look like when half its members no longer live together?
- Would Greg and I be able to fill our days without the constant flow of kids and sports and school activities?
- Who would my children be?
- Where would they live, go, work?
- Who would they love and eventually marry?
- How would we maintain our sense of family being so far away from one another?
These are the anxious thoughts that used to torment me- how I learned to deal with these painful thoughts is the subject of another blog- but trust me when I tell you- I no longer wring my hands in agony or toss and turn at night worrying about what “might” be. I have found peace and so can you.
Here’s what I want to tell you (and what I wish I had known 4 and even 8 years ago):
- Yes, everything is changing and that is o.k. – get comfortable with it because change is constant- embrace it and don’t be so afraid of it.
- Nature really does abhor a vacuum... in other words, your days will fill with activities and events and you will find you aren’t really missing Friday Night Lights and teacher conferences and working the concession stand or driving car pool (trust me – it’s true!).
- You are heading into some of the most exciting, fun, invigorating and creative years of your life.
- You are going to have time to pursue the dreams you have put on hold (and maybe even forgotten) and some new ones are going to emerge.
- Most importantly, you can (and will) have closer, more dynamic and FUN relationships with your family (this is the absolute truth)!
Don’t believe me? There’s picture proof from last week’s family vacation. We had a blast biking, beaching, eating and drinking with our adult kids and their “significants” as I like to call the lovely, wonderful people my children have brought into our lives. (And no, we did not color coordinate on purpose- we had all been out doing our own things and met up at this slightly skeezy beach bar only to find ourselves perfectly synchronized)
So if you are an almost or mid-way Empty Nester and you are sad or worried- take heart! And if you need a little help as you navigate through the beginning (or middle) stages of this new chapter in your life- now is the time to call me- your empty nest life coach! I love helping people in this stage! For your free consult click here.